Don’t Stop the Party!

I drove through the neighborhood the day after Christmas and, as usual, was dismayed to see Christmas trees, stripped and discarded on the curbs. “Don’t stop the party!” I call out. (This is a battle cry I have taken from some of my most alive friends.) But few seem to be listening.  I accept that, but I will not stop haranguing about celebrating the twelve days of Christmas. The celebrations can be quiet and small, and don’t have to include partridges in pear trees or five golden rings. Intentionality is required, however, and perseverance. Before you say “bah humbug,” read on about how I keep the party going.

 On the second day of Christmas, a sense of calmness settled in my soul as rain pounded on the roof. After two days of big family celebrations, I was happy to sit by my fireplace and gaze at the Nativity scene. I allowed my mind to wander and wonder about Christmas past, the meaning of the Incarnation. I re-read the book Nativities of the World and savored each beautiful photograph. I listened to the Christmas section of Handel’s Messiah, and ate a few Christmas cookies. Then I read the final chapters of the novel Euphoria by Lily King, one of my recent favorite novelists. I celebrated the love of reading, one of the greatest gifts I have ever received.

On the third day of Christmas, I went to see the movie “Hamnet” with my daughters and a friend. We had all read the book by Maggie O’Farrell (another favorite author) and were eager to see how it was adapted. The story chronicles the impact of losing a child on a family, in this case, Shakespeare’s son, Hamnet, who died of the plague when he was only twelve.  Both the film and the book pack a powerful emotional response.  Read the book first, is my advice! Afterward, we went out to dinner and dissected the whole movie over delicious Thai food. There is nothing like a great conversation with people you love! My heart was full when I returned to the quiet of my home. Celebrating around a table creates unforgettable sacramental moments.

On the fourth day of Christmas, I walked the entire Dana Point Harbor with one of my dearest friends, and we talked about Christmas, family, and the importance of spending time together. We drank hot chocolate, even though it was a glorious sixty-five degrees and sunny. Then we paid a visit to the beautiful Nativity scene at St. Edward the Confessor Church, where we both used to work. Although we see it every year, we fell silent before the life-size figures. In the background, sunbeams turned the ocean view into a sea of diamonds. The hush was holy and full of many sweet memories. Celebrating friendship, sans phones and distractions, deepens bonds of love and well-being.

As I age, I feel the sense of calm, peaceful celebration increasing. My spirit is much more receptive to the deep-down serenity that often eluded me during my busier years. Perhaps peace is merely an ideal we strive for our entire lives, and only catch fleeting moments when we are generative, busy, and restless for more. When we are privileged to live longer, time does not slow down; however, the ability to slip into the stillness is no longer another task on the to-do list. Time spent in contemplation opens the door to the timelessness of the Holy One, and to inner peace that can then be shared with all who grace our lives.

To be continued. . .

Books on the Tenth Day of Christmas

“I wish I had a river I could skate away on; I wish I had a river so long it would teach my feet to fly. . .I wish I had a river I could skate away on. . .” from “River” by Joni Mitchell

No secret: I am a bibliophile. Libraries and bookstores rank high on my list of favorite places. Lately, one of my most pleasurable activities is scouring the bookshelves of Friends of the Library and local thrift stores. Today, on the tenth day of Christmas, I made a little excursion to offset the “after Christmas” doldrums.  The treasured volumes I find delight and astound me! I love rescuing favorites so I can gift them to friends and family.  I only buy the books I have already read and know are worth the time and effort. The best part, these precious tomes are a bargain—each a dollar or two at the most.

I have skated away on a river of books ever since I learned to read for pleasure. Novels, nonfiction, classic literature, children’s books—well, I love them all. My children and grandchildren are well aware of this facet of my personhood. One of their Christmas gifts every year is a book I think they need to read. I resist the urge to question them later. My hope is that they keep the books and someday, when ready, will read them.

In our technologically-oriented culture, people today do not read much for escape and pleasure any more. That does not settle well in my soul. According to a recent YouGov survey, around 54% of Americans reported reading at least one book in 2023, with a significant portion (46%) stating they did not read any books in the past year; this data suggests a decline in overall reading habits compared to previous years. I find this shocking, especially with anxiety and depression on the rise. We all need a reading river to skate away on sometimes!

 Unfortunately, that river is most often social media, texting, or internet cyberspace environments that do not transport to a land of enchantment and beauty. My youngest daughter is a high school English teacher, and we have many conversations about how to nurture the next generation of readers. Her students read all the time on their phones but not the literature she assigns so she often reads with her students in class to pique their interest in the stories. I think this is a good strategy—sort of like reading with children at bedtime, evoking a sense of intimacy and enjoyment.  Admittedly, this does not work all the time. Mysteriously, many people do not find reading for pleasure a priority and sadly, there are no quick fixes.

Meanwhile, I will continue my crusade to help others find this enriching and free pathway. While challenging, perhaps we elders should share our wisdom (without judgment) and teach our young ones how to skate.

May you feel the glorious freedom flowing from the river of books right at your fingertips.

Twelve Days to Celebrate!

It’s Christmas Eve—the most “filled-with-anticipation” day of the year for excited children and harried parents busy making memories and dreams come true. I breathe in deeply and smile because after four weeks of Advent, the longing is over. It’s time for an almost two-week celebration of JOY! Well, at least for some of us!

Every year, beginning on December 25, it has been my tradition to fully celebrate all twelve days of Christmas. No gifts of partridges in pear trees (although I do like to ponder the symbolism of that song), rather, a grateful response for the many gifts of that light that blaze from even the most quotidian of places.

Simply put, I love this designated time to celebrate the Incarnation, the infusion of the Divine into every order corner of my life. At year’s end, this practice steadies and fortifies me for whatever the coming twelve months will bring. I think of this as an indulgent gift, not only to myself but to all who strive for wisdom and seek more meaning out of life than our consumer culture can ever provide. Rather than feeling let down the day after Christmas (as so many children often experience), or a sense of “good riddance” (as so many adults experience), the elation increases each day and encourages me to stay in the “Christmas frame of mind” through Epiphany on January 6th.

For years, I have written and shared these reflections with family and friends, in person and online, and many of you have accompanied me on this little sojourn. So once again, I invite you to take this twelve-day journey with me. Resist the urge to take down the tree and put away the decorations early! Linger for a while in the glow, linger in the light, and feel rightfully energized when the first week of 2025 unfolds.